Monkeys and Coconuts

Been an interesting week. So, last week on sunday a girl we'll call 'Sylvie', came from out of town, she wanted to hookup. I was a bit apprehensive, but stoked. She showed up and in my mind my jaw hit the floor. She was ruddy gorgeous. Amazing looks. We sat around talking for a while, and it was surprising, we got along more than I thought, music, thinking patterns, beliefs, it was a bit strange. But we clicked. I thought so anyways. really well. She acted alot like we did. It surprised me how much I liked her. But she told me she'd never date me cuz she liked being single. And surprise surprise, she's found someone she's dating now. /sigh/ I know I'm glad she's happy, but part of me is thinking when do I get another chance at being happy? Am I supposed to wait another 19 years? I dont know if I can handle that. What shocked me most was her beliefs in God. We seemed to have the same ideals. Ah well...other topic. So on Monday her and I got REALLY drunk, since I hadnt eaten in a couple days, and at 4:30 pm tuesday I Was still hungover, it was painful. But she came to watch our mixed class, and one of the owners goes "hey, you wanna fight in Saskatoon on saturday?" Hung over as I am..."sure, why the fuck not" So I was scheduled for my first fight. Trained for the week, and friday around 6:30pm we head out. While making a couple wrong turns, it took us 10 hours to drive to saskatoon. Had a good conversation on the way there, my coach is writing a book, and we were discussing the potential existence of God, since one of the guys is a non-believer, and for 4 hours, discussing the correlation between theology and the theory of evolution and the philosophies of kenisiology and its relation to this, my brain was on high gear. I loved it. So we pull into Saskatoon, and we're lost. finally found the hotel it was a fucking dump. But it was somewhere to sleep. Woke up, went to weigh-ins, and got lost again. haha somewhere in this trip one of the guys asks our coach "what should we eat before the fights, for energy? pasta?" and he just starts to laugh and the conversation went something like this:

"why, why on earth, would you want pasta?"
"well its carbs right? carbs are energy my wrestling coach always told us to eat pasta"
"****** if ignorance is bliss, you must live in a frickin utopia. like, God beside you, butterflies everywhere, flowers, just, utopia"
*by this time me and the other are laughing our asses off*
"well then what do we eat?"


Our coach went on to explain to eat greens, to use the energy of the sun, in first tier foods. but that was the most amusing part of the conversation. We bugged that kid about his clothes alot too, the full adidas tracksuits kinda person. So, after weighin's, we eat some food, and go back to the hotel to take a nap, rest up. and by now we're all freakin nervous as hell. It was mildly batshit nuts. Fight time comes, we get there, get all taped up, first guy goes up, and absolutely DESTROYED his opponent, like, utter domination. it was a good start to the night. Next up was Adidas boy. He'd lost his first fight by submission and he more than made up for it this time. Tapped his guy out at 37 seconds of the first round. My turn. Suddenly I wasnt nervous though, I was just plain stoked. So its my turn to fight (for some unknown reason I was the semi main event). I get in the ring, and its time to party. The guy looks like a striker, pure and simple. I had a gameplan. box. if he's faster, take it to the ground. We were wrong. First thing he does, comes in for a takedown. I clinched up, threw some knees, and we go to the ground. he landed a hammerfist on my nose, but it just wasnt that hard, I get his harder than that while sparring sometimes. I hit him in the head a few times. he some how got into a mount (not sure how I dont remember), and I reversed him so I was in his guard, went to ground and pound him, and he went for what looked to be a triangle, so I went to throw his legs to the side and go to a sidemount but he held one arm and got an armbar on me, I couldnt escape. so I tapped. but, it was good experience, and it was a good fight. From what the crowd was saying it was a crowd pleaser. So we decide to drive home that night, since the hotel was a dump, and the bar wasnt much better. We stop in a BP's for some dinner, alot of people had pizza, I went for pasta, I'm kind of a pasta nut. My coach had some powder for upping your white blood cell count, just because he wasnt feeling well and wanted to boost his immune system, so him and the others were eating this powder, and he pulled out a bottle of green stuff, for something...didnt quite catch what. But have you ever gone hiking, and seen a nice....big....greenish....dried up....shit. Right in the middle of the trail? well this powder looked like someone ground one of those shit's up, and put it in a bottle. so I was like "Coach, that stuff looks like ground up dried monkey shit". He kinda laughed, and suddenly one of the other guys was like "In my university class, i learned this little tid....apparently, when male chimpanzee's in a group get mad...instead of fighting like gorillas, they have male orgies". We all just kinda stared at him for a minute, and suddenly my coach goes off on this tangent for about 15 minutes about how if men raping other men up the ass is wrong and persecuted, which it is and should be, then monkeys raping each others asses should be persecuted too.

Thats right. I have been part of a conversation, about the Persecution of Monkey's and Ass Rape.


Dear God save me.


So I drove part way home, then Coach, then Coach's girlfriend (oh yeah, my coach will hitherto be known as Coach). It was a long weekend. and now I've got training to do.

As a side note...ever notice the girls are getting younger and younger....the only girls I really think are cute that actually pay attention to me, be it conversationally or more, are all 17.....dammit. Anyways. I'm out.

Fucking was how babies were made.

Music: Foo Fighters - DOA

Sheer brilliance. It comes in select few, especially in this day an age where wrought ingenuity is all but lost on the technology that it ironically created to replace itself. Kurt Vonnegut, author of 'Breakfast of Champions', is one of those select few. I'm on a greyhound bus, at 8:02 in the morning, headed for Calgary in hopes to visit a lady I'm highly taken with, and my brother and his family. Bro lent be the aforementioned book, said I'd love it. I've read only 5 or 6 pages, and I do, its genuine cynicism is truely specatular plainly for its truth in fact. Mentioned is the American national anthem, nonense about war, riddled with question marks, following the writing of which, the Star Spangled banner was written in law to "never be dipped to person or thing", which, also noted, flag-dipping was a social sign of respect. The sheer arrogance of this law begats so much that comes to follow in our time. The inevitable bullying of other, smaller, in general ALL other countries, by threat of invasion or explosion. How is it, when one country says "we want you to disarm, so you dont kill us", that its ok for that same country to keep thousands of the worlds most devastating weapons, as 'precaution'? Also briefly mentioned is the idiocy of our European ancestry in not correcting our schooling. The America's were not "first found and inhabited" by humans in 1942, quite the contrary, as Natives, Tribal factions, all the way back prior to Aztec's even, had covered, and thrived over this land. 1942 was just when we started stealing what they'd worked so hard to create, an actual civilization.


Ok, 2 days later and I've taken a break from the book.....2 days ago, mostly because of the arrival in Calgary and following events. So lets take a look at them. My nephew, is getting better, which in that fact alone is enough to make me a happy man. As long as he's mending, I'm good. But for other purposes, not so much. So I've mentioned I had a place lined up to live (I think anyways), well, it was in the basement of a girl's house, and that girl, I happen to have a rather large crush on. She knows this, and seemingly reciprocates, typically a good thing. So, before Christmas I asked for her address, I'd wanted to send her a Christmas card, and possibly visit her. Neither of these came to fruition however and I've been a bit bitchy about it, to be blatant. So I went to go see her yesterday, got a ride up to SAIT, and started my trek, which by map, should only have been about 4 blocks. Four blocks down, I was not seeing the right place, so I start a walk in what SEEMS to be the right direction. (Just because its bugging me that I haven't named her, she'll be known as Shera). I realized, wait a goddamn minute I've been walking the wrong direction for 6 blocks. Fuck. So I start to job the other way, because for some strange reason, it was nagging at me to hurry, that I might miss her and she'd leave, or something retarded like that. I always get a nagging feeling in the stomach, and butterflies from hell everytime I'm about to see her, which is surprising, I've met ALOT of people off the internet, including girls I like, and I'm never nervous about it. Her though, everytime. Its like I somehow fear that I'll blow any chance I have out of the water, but I digress. I jog, man did I jog. With a 40 lb backpack chaffing my lower back as bad as wearing straight burlap, I jogged. And then I walk, for about a block, vainly of course, not wanting to look like I'd ran and seemed desperate to see her (although really, I suppose I was, I really like her). So I walk up to the house, knock on the door and think "sweet, I have milk chocolate cuz its her fav, I'll surprise her with a visit". Ring....Ring.....Knock Knock. No one's home. Son. of. a. mother. fucker. But the girl walking down the road looks strangely like her sister...can't be went into the house across the road. So I left the M&M's I'd gotten for her, and walked across the road to some construction guys, borrowed a pencil and a block of cardboard (yes, a BLOCK of cardboard, no doubt from the packing of something), and wrote a quick note "Shera, you SUCK, I came all the way and you aren't home!" And leave. Caught the bus..the C-train, all the way back down to Chinook Mall. I order a burrito. I'm munchin, and thinkin "fuck, all this way...WAIT A MINUTE!" I'd come to the sudden clueing in, that she lives in a 2 story house, she's told me, not a one story. And the house across the street WAS a 2 story house. It must've BEEN her sister. Well I came all this way, I'm not leaving without at least one more shot at seeing her. So BACK onto the train, and I catch an extremely brief cab ride to her block, walk up and suddenly I'm hit with a streak of panic so bad I almost walked away, I'd even started back down the walk. What if I was wrong, what if this isnt her house, what if all my so sluethy deductions were a complete fallacy made up in my head? I had to try, so I thought of a line at the door "Excuse me, does Shera ******* live here?" (weak, so what). But I knock, and she opens the door, holding her dog back, and mutters a "Hi". Suddenly her head snaps up, and she following conversation goes approximately

"uh...HI! Oh my God what're you doing here?"
"Well hi, I told you I'd randomly show up at your door one day. WITH milk chocolate (pulled out a new bag of m&m's)"
"Awwww" (ensuing hug and a brief kiss I wasnt expecting but was blushingly glad to have)
"So how are you?"
"I can't believe you're here, how did you get here?"
"Greyhound...and walking...and the c-train"
"I can't believe you're here...but my son's Dad is coming in like, 2 minutes...I'm sorry.."
"Well that bites, I was here earlier, like 3 hours ago, but YOU, gave me the wrong address, and I went across the road"
"Really? thats funny. I can't believe you're here"

To which I laughed, took another couple hugs, a nice kiss, and her Ex pulled up, so I left. Was going to say hi to her ex, just for the reaction, but I didnt feel like starting a fight. But my first thought at seeing him, I swear, was "what a tool..I could so take him out". Stupid testosterone. So I went back on the bus, back on the C-train, and back to Chinook, and since I couldnt get ahold of my sister, I walked. Now, I'm used to lethbridge, where mostly likely just due to the sheer number of street lights and possibly the layout of the city, a 5 minute drive is about a 15-20 minute walk equivalent. Not in Calgary. And during late rush hour, around 7:30 pm, walking down Glenmore, is a very BAD idea, especially having to outwit exits and merges and traffic and run across the road several times. It was NOT a fun time. Took me about an hour...perhaps an hour and a half I dont know, my phone was off, never saw the time. Now Shera had promised to call, or email, or get ahold of me SOMEHOW so we could spend time together today. Never happened, naturally. For someone as interested as she claims to be, she sure doesnt put much of an effort in. I realize she has busy times and a child to take care of, but for shits sake, you have to try a LITTLE bit for something to happen! But oh well, slept at my brothers house, got up, went to the hospital, saw my nephew, who proceeded to attept to stuff a donut in his mouth, something he apparently hasnt tried in weeks. A good sign. So leaving the hospital I catch the bus...C-train...and bus, and walk up to her house, yet again. Theoretically the 3rd time in 24 hours. Although technically only twice. She answers, "oh, hi" and goes to wash dishes. I probly spent a half hour just....standing and talking, and she didnt seem to care I was even in the building. So it was a bit of a down side. I almost felt like she didnt like me anymore. I felt BAD even, just for going! Worst part yet, she tells me her dad has decided to sell the house, and move her and the family down to Oregon. Well double whammy, I just lost my apartment AND the girl I like, in one sentence. Ouch. Trying to hide quite easily apparent heartbreak, I stood around for a few more minutes, and then she apparently had to go write a test at her school, so I left so she could get ready. Decided screw the bus, I'm going for a walk down the Trans Canada (at least it has a freakin sidewalk). I saw some REALLY cool stuff, I went into a killer pawn shop, saw a few very nice articles. Went into Guitarworks and saw the most intense display of Gibson SG's and acoustic guitars I've ever witnessed. The Acoustic display rooms were beautifully arranged for display, colored nicely, and smelled of fresh sawdust, which personally, I love the smell of. I wanted to curl up and sleep. I was happy in there. But I kept on truckin, and eventually found a little hole in the wall podunk internet game cafe. So I threw down for a bit, it was really cheap, and played some World of Warcraft, which Shera, in specific had conned me into buying. After a couple hours (I decided I liked it there), she was online, and told me she never did end up at the school, and was in a really bad mood, and was sorry I had to leave. Well, ok, I guess thats an apology. Told me she'd fought with her dad, which is a shame, I've fought with my parents, its never fun. But we spoke a little bit, and I think she was either ignoring me, or just enveloped in the game. Who knows. But I felt REALLY bad, when she said during her fight, someone knocked on the door and she was like "for FUCKS sake"....she denies, but I think she thought it was me. So I felt even worse. But again, contrary to promise, she never called. or will, I dont think. So I called up my sister and got back on the greyhound, I'm not going to waste her or my time and the last few dollars I have going back on the C-train tomorrow. I'll just go home, veg out, play Xbox....and probably be really sad. I really like her, and I dont want the chance to slip away. Anyone understand why I get so excessively emo now? All the chances I have to be happy seem to just....slip away, with nothing I can do to prevent it. Its not HER stopping me from moving in with her, its her dad. The landlord. If the landlord doesnt want to rent what can you do? I sigh. Argh. I hate to say it but I totally think I've completely fallen for her. I need a nap. I'll write again another time

Life Rolls On...

So I'm at work. A little bit buzzed. UFC 59 was on tonight, Bro and I went over to a local pub called Fat Boyz, partially owned and operated by a guy who does MMA with us. They were going to show UFC on the big screen. Sweet right? So we get there, have some food, and another MMA guy shows up (mind by this point there were a whole crap load of the MMA guys there, but they had a full table), and he sits with us, and the 3 of us order a Team Pitcher of Kokanee. Beer gets to the table, and holy shit, that is ALOT of beer, like, we're talkin a full gallon of beer, probly a little more. A mug of beer later, one of the employee's says there's a problem with the satellite, and we can't watch the fights. Well shit, we still have just over 3/4 of a gallon of beer. So a drinkin we go. A bit later after literally EVERY other person in the pub left, the employee's (who know we fight with the owner) give us a 3/4 full pitcher of Canadian. Sweet, free beer! Still no luck with the fights. Owner comes over, talkin to us, pretty pissed off, he just lost ALOT of good business, like 50 good customers who woulda been there allll night. Turns out, 2 months ago they were cut off for non pay. But he paid up, and its been 2 months since right? Apparently, Bell Express Vu says, "you have to have 3 months straight pay completed before we can allow you to order PPV". FUCK THAT! He got jewed out of alot of good business, and I don't blame him for calling up Star Choice and switching satellite companies ASAP. Bastards. So by the time all the beer is gone, and we leave, I'm a bit....ok fairly tipsy. Call up a friend when we get home....yes a "friend". She comes over, we go at 'er, and off to work I go. Decent night considering this week has been absolute hell. Wanna hear that part? no? too bad bitch, stop reading.

So, my year and a half old nephew, is in the hospital. Last week he caught the flu. By last friday, he was in the hospital, with a really BAD flu, by monday they'd deduced it was asthma, and had him on ventilens (I have no idea how that's supposed to be spelled). Wednesday morning he was trying to breathe so hard, he punched a hole in his left lung, it collapsed and began filling his chest with air, forcing the organs to the right side of his chest, and beginning to collapse them as well. My small little nephew was dying. Cutest kid you ever saw, and he was about to leave us for Home. They managed to stabilize him, and eventually downgrade from critical to serious. Yesterday they tried taking the tube out to excersize his lungs, he nosedived, worse than wednesday. Believe me, rarely have I begged God this hard in my life, this little boy deserves more time than most people on the planet. As of today, he's listed as critcal, but stable. I pray to God he only gets better. Gladly would I die so he would have more time here.

So, I'm not sure as of yet whether I'll get to move to Calgary or to pave this summer I guess it comes down to money really. If I can find a GOOD solid job up in calgary, maybe pave up there, then I'll go there, if not, well then I won't I suppose. I'll pave in Lloyd. I really hope I can find a job in Calgary that would pay as well, I'd like to be centralized. So far, I even have a place lined up, which I'd love to go through with, its the basement of prior-post mentioned friend with the 1 year old. I'm goin to try to go up and see her sometime very soon, I really rather adore her. she's such a darling girl, I just wish I could get AHOLD of her too! Its hard, she spends alot of time playing WoW (World of Warcraft for you who arent nerds like I am) instead of using MSN, and her phone has issues so she leaves it off most of the time, so I can't call her. She hasnt replied to emails lately either, which leads me to believe she's either not checking her email, as she usually replies. Last I spoke she'd said she was going to be job hunting so she may have found a job as well, keeping her busy. I'd like to know if she'd even be home if I went up though, so it's a bit of a challenge. But, if I'm job hunting, making a run for a day wouldnt be so bad, I might just borrow my parents car, if I can get them to let me, might have to pay for some insurance, but I could live with that. Run a few resume's out and I'd be good with the day. Go see the nephews (hopefully all 3 kids, both nephews and the neice, at home, and healthy), and see her and her little one if I could. But, its time for me to go stock the cooler, I'll write more later.